You Must Remember This – It Matters Why and When You Kiss

It was a lovely, and pretty typical, Friday evening. The kids were out with friends and the house was all theirs. They were snuggled together on the couch watching this week’s movie choice. They took turns choosing the movie of the week.

Tonight’s movie was a classic, Casablanca. They both knew it well and enjoyed it every time. They hadn’t watched it in awhile, but when the song came on, “As time goes by”, they both sang along. At the end, they sighed, smiled at each other, and, naturally, kissed to mark the line, “A kiss is just a kiss.”

When the movie ended, Tia turned to Tucker and said, “I liked that kiss. We should do more of that.”

Tucker, recognizing his cue, immediately kissed her gently on the lips. Tia smiled and said, “I like that.” After a couple of moments, Tia said, “Tucker, why don’t we kiss more often? We used to kiss all the time. People used to tease us about the dangers of chapped lips. When did we stop kissing so much?”

Tucker wrinkled his forehead as he considered the question. “Hmm. I don’t know the answer, but I think I know the solution.” And he pulled her closer and locked lips with her. This time it wasn’t so much a gentle kiss as a suggestive one. The suggestion was made all the more obvious by the way he was pulling against her.

To his confusion, Tia pulled away and started talking again.

“Whoa, Tucker. That is not where I was going with the conversation.”

“Tia, we just watched one of the most romantic movies ever made. Then you made a point about us kissing more. I thought our direction was pretty obvious.” Tucker wasn’t so much angry as he was just completely confused. But he was not a novice at this marriage communication thing; he had skills! He reoriented and sat back a bit. He made eye contact and made an inquiry, smiling so that Tia felt that he was on her side.

“Okay, Tia, help me understand what you were thinking.”

Tia had learned to trust that Tucker really wanted to know, so she explained.

“I think we’ve gotten so familiar and casual with each other and so busy that we don’t often stop and just connect through kissing. Kissing means we have to stop doing everything else and just for those few moments be totally with each other. It’s a lovely thing, but I think it’s an interruption of a sort that we don’t often make time or thought for.”

Tucker nodded. This made sense to him. They’d even made do too often with just making a kissing gesture across the room when one or the other of them left the house.

But, looking at Tia, Tucker had a suspicion that there was another thought there that she needed to share.

“Tia, there’s something else on your mind. Spill it.” He smiled at her to encourage her to speak freely.

“Well, I think it was more than just time going by. I may have to take some responsibility for this. I think I started to avoid kissing you because I didn’t want to raise your expectations. A lot of the time when we’d kiss, especially if I initiated the kiss, you took it from gentle affection to something more passionate. And then it would seem that you expected it to evolve into sex. I didn’t want to give you that message all the time. So I think I just stopped kissing. But I really miss the kissing.”

Tia looked sad.

Tucker looked thoughtful. His forehead wrinkled again.

“Well, I guess I have to share that responsibility. It’s pretty much true that I would like most of those kisses to be passionate and to lead to more. You’re always beautiful to me, Tia, and I almost always want to be passionate with you. But you’ve explained to me before that your mindset isn’t always in that place, so I guess I get that the passionate stuff doesn’t always feel welcome or well-timed.”

Tia smiled broadly and lovingly at Tucker when she heard how well he had listened and how well he understood her feelings, even when they were different from his own.

Tucker hit the jackpot when he then said, “So how about I just follow your lead if you take the kiss up a notch?” At which point she most clearly did.

How to Write a Winning Business Proposal: Work at It to Keep It Simple and Short

Your business proposal has just landed on the client’s desk along with those of your competitors. In a week’s time you’ll find out whether they thought yours was the best. It isn’t an RFP so it doesn’t go through the strict, weighted evaluation such proposals require. However, those who judge it will be equally strict in assessing your qualifications. Adhering to the KISS principle could be a major step in your favor.

I’m reading a book called Riders in the Chariot by Nobel prize-winning author Patrick White. It’s a challenging read, with complex characters and situations. It would never qualify under the KISS principle, being at times convoluted, repetitive and wordy. On the other hand, Stieg Larsson’s The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo is a taut, easier-to-read book one might consider the KISS principle at work.

For those who still may not know, KISS stands for Keep It Simple, Stupid, or perhaps more appropriate for evaluating proposals, Keep It Simple and Short. In my articles I refer often to the importance of the KISS principle. When writing a proposal, I am particularly concerned that it flows seamlessly from start to finish. I’m not after perfection. What I do want is for the reader to follow me at every stage. In other words, there’s a logic that takes them from the introduction to the situation, to the client’s desired result, and how the process unfolds.

I don’t want the reader to have to backtrack. If they do, they’ll lose the thread of what I have to say, meaning I’ve slipped up in my communication. More than likely, I’ve made some assumption that I expect the reader to figure out without my telling them. No reader should have to jump back and forth to decide whether to recommend your proposal. This requires constant vigilance on your part to follow a simple format structure from the start. How do you attain that structure? Use mind mapping and/or brainstorming to determine the component parts, then place those parts in the correct sequence.

It ought to be easy. Sometimes that’s true, more often it’s not. Stieg Larsson makes it look simple, but you can bet he’s done a lot of editing to get there. I’ll go through two or three versions of a proposal before it meets my KISS criteria. You have to edit it down, shape it, and ensure that all the pieces come together. It looks simple, and when it gets into the hands of the reader for evaluation, that’s how it needs to read.

Will your business proposal make it to the top of the pile? If you Keep It Simple and Short, as in the KISS principle, you will improve the odds. But you will have to work at it.

Deliver the Mind Blowing Kiss He Will Never Forget

When the date is over, and he is ready to leave, do you want to deliver a mind blowing kiss he will never forget? Are you well versed in techniques that seductive women use to leave their boyfriends with something to look forward to the next time they meet? Is your own kiss in need of a serious upgrade? Then you need to follow these trusted guidelines that will turn your average kiss, into something he will not soon forget.

Timing is everything.

The mind blowing kiss should be the last kiss of the day, and you want the kiss to have a lasting effect on him. Make sure all of the discussions are finished, and it appears that he is ready to leave. This is the best opportunity for you to show him that you have deep feelings for him, and the kiss needs to deliver that message.

It’s all about the delivery.

At the end of the day, when he is ready to give you a kiss goodbye, look deep into his eyes and draw him close to you. Keep your lips lightly together as they meet his and take care to keep them relaxed and soft. Begin slowly and gently moving your head and lips, so not to startle him with too much passion in the beginning.

Keep your hands busy.

When building up the passion for your mind blowing kiss, remember to keep your hands busy. While there may be a strong urge for you to put them where they don’t belong, do use them to stroke his back and steady his head. This will enable you to better press your entire body closer to him.

The kiss should be an all body experience.

The mind blowing kiss should involve your whole body, not just your mouth. While head movement is natural, let the rest of your body enjoy his embrace. This will relax him and give him the impression he is the one in control.

Polishing off the kiss.

As the mind blowing kiss begins to get passionate, let your tongue touch his lips ever so lightly. This will present the opportunity to French kiss. If he is open to the French kiss, again let him lead, and when it happens enjoy the taste of him while letting him enjoy you. Don’t be surprised if he is breathing a little heavier when you finish up, and part company.